I love to sing. I am not an accomplished singer, but I love to sing in my house and in my car and in the shower and to my kids. I love singing grunge from my youth, Justin Timberlake falsetto from his album 20/20, Talking Heads, new female country artists like Margo Price, and I love singing Tune-Yards, which exemplifies the ridiculousness of my assumption that I can actually sing. Merrill Garbus, one of the two members of the band, is an opera singer.
As a child I was not fully confident in my voice. I was labeled as shy, which I guess is accurate though in this day and age I see the dangers of labeling children as they can inadvertently develop tendencies consistent with said label. I digress.
My sister sang. She was in choir at school and church and practiced piano and did recitals. My mother was also musically inclined in her youth as part of a folk band in high school. She sang to us as kids.
One day I remember driving with the two of them. I must have been about 12 and for some reason, the topic of my singing came up.
“I bet Andy is a good singer,” my sister said in some manner.
“I am sure he is,” agreed my mom.
That was it. I am sure I didn't even respond. I feel like I was in the back seat only half way participating in the conversation. And yet, from that moment forward. I sang to myself when I could. And I enjoyed it and I think I sounded okay and a funny thing happened. My overall confidence grew. It occurs to me just now that I literally found my voice thanks to 2 sentences and ten seconds of dialogue from a non-conversation.
I am sure neither my sister nor my mother would remember this. Why would they? It isn’t as if I went on to be a great musician after that. It is not really a remarkable origin story except that it is. Who knows what the context was or why they even said it? It was a kind thing to say even if it had no basis. At the very least, it was a kind gesture with a profound impact.
As an advocate for all of you and your well being and by proxy as you advocate for others, I am suggesting that we lean towards professing kindness and encouragement whenever possible. You never know when doing so might have a profound effect on the person on the other side of the conversation. Obviously the sentiment professed needs to be genuine.
I think this general philosophy can be effective when employed as the root of advice provided to your clients with respect to their real estate dealings.
I think it would go something like this:
“I bet you’re a good singer!”
“Wow! That’s such a nice thing to say. How many of these $2m condos can I buy?”
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Okay, maybe that’s a stretch, but what if you commended their saving habits or their drive to take good care of their family or maybe you tell a stranger you like their outfit or tell your family member that you appreciate how they listen. What butterfly effect could you have on someone’s life that will stand out in their mind and consequently have you standout in their mind down the road?
The first time I sang in front of an audience was at my wedding. And even then I had help from the DJ and all those in attendance when I sang “This Must Be The Place” by the Talking Heads. Some 30 years after this 30 second conversation. I am a broker, hence I am in sales, I am the president of a company, I speak up on the Planning and Zoning Committee of the 44th Ward, and I don’t think I would be here today without the kind words of my mom and my sister. And while I still feel “shy” in certain situations I do my best to rise to all occasions and I do my best to be kind in all situations because you simply don’t know the profundity your impact may have.
